Tami falls into the world of Naruto
by Chocolat Meilleure
Summary: A girl gets trapped in the world of Naruto THAT is all I need to say...
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

I did it again. I did something horrible, vile, disgusting etc. I ruined my life! My name is Tami. I live in the forest and no one knows I exist. I do have traps in the forest and that is how I fell into this mess! I was training when I heard something get caught in my trap. I decided to go on, capture it, and then cook it on a little fire. Considering I have been living on worms this month, it sounded great. My stomach was so happy. I was finally going to have a cute little bunny or big bear for lunch. Yes! I came nearer to my destination, and saw… _an old man dangling from the branch. _Ewe… I may have come from the forest but gross. I would never eat another human being _maybe if I had to_, but not this one. Yuck. He seemingly was impressed with the trap and capable of getting out of it, but did not. He smiled a little weird smile. I came up to him. His smile grew. _Scary. Scary. Scary. _He was a big pervert. I could not stand his nasty smile, so I kind of punched him in the face. I think a tooth or teeth fell out in the process. Okay, I am not the type of girl who goes around punching old men but this one deserved it. I took him down the trap and carried him home. I am definitely not the type of girl who goes and brings old men home, but I hit him too hard. I went and got some seaweed from the pond and spread it on his face to heal it. A little. He could talk, or mumble. A few minutes later, he began humming. _Again, scary, scary, scary. _"Hello?" I asked.

"Hi, sweet woman of my dreams!" he exclaimed leaping up and putting his arms around me. BOOM! I, ha, ha, ha, punched him in the area. Haha and a final ha. I felt bad, but there was no way of me putting seaweed on his… I decided that maybe he was drunk. I carried him to a room and left him there, for hours or a day. I did leave food there but it stacked up. I went and got a pail of water finally. I entered the room and SPLASH! He was soaking wet. He did wake up, though. I questioned him a bit. I asked him a couple simple math questions. He finally said something very interesting.

"Hello. My name will for now be unknown to you, but I have to be kind to my savor." he said.

"What?" I questioned.

"You saved me from that trap when I was a bit drunk, thank you," he said. "I must give you something very pleasant and appetizing."  
Okay, he has some nerve. He is saying he wants to give me something really good, in a pervert's mind like his; I do not want to know what hat is. I told him I'd be back in a sec. I went to the kitchen and got some homemade pepper spray. I returned. "So, what was it you were saying?"

"I want to give you a big, new part of the world. Something you might expect or not…" He kept talking about giving me some of this or this. I do not have a short temper, but when an old geyser smiles strangely at you, leaps and hugs you, calls you the girl of his dreams, and goes on talking about giving you something good (probably for his enjoyment, if you know what I mean, wink wink wink), you begin to get irritated. I got my spray in my hand and Sting. He got sprayed. Oh yeah! "Justice is done" I was a bit scared. The old man was a little, teeny bit mad! He asked me what he had done to deserve this.

"You are an old pervert. You smiled strangely at me, leapt and hug me, called me the girl of your dreams, and you go on talking about giving me something really good. Umm… I do not know how to tell you this but you are a BIG pervert. Moreover, maybe a drunk. I will not stand this! Believe it!"

"Ha, ha, ha. Oh boy." he laughed.

"Why are you laughing?" I questioned.

"It's just that you reminded me of somebody when you said 'Believe it'! You see there is this-" he was talking but I interrupted him.

"I'm sorry, but I don't care." I said.

"Please let me give you a gift."

"Stay back, I have more pepper spray!" I shouted.

"No! I would never hurt a woman," he sneered. I am so… scared. He sneered at me. Double yuck. Make that triple!

"Please!" I exclaimed.

"I will give you a gift. It's a one way ticket to a beautiful place and you'll meet…"

"Stop! I don't want to do anything with you!" I yelled!  
"I will give you a gift. Do not interrupt me, now. It is to a place where I come from. I came here to get some ramen for a friend, given that in this world, it is the best! I just want to say I can bring you there. I won't be with you, but you'll end up there, so do you want to go?" the old man said.

I was very surprised and startled; I mean what I am supposed to say. Why should I believe him anyways? "Okay, Go ahead, but no dirty work, or else!"

"Go rest, we'll leave tomorrow." he said. I was ashamed. He was telling me what to do, in my house! I decided not to bother him. I packed my favorite book series, _Icha Icha Paradise_. I packed my clothes and an anklet bracelet I got from my grandfather. It looks like a swirl and then a beak coming out of it, or something. I decided to put it on instead. I packed my ramen, pocky sticks, and health utensils (medicine, herbs, strawberry shampoo, toothpaste, etc.). I will be off to my own little adventure soon.

Wait! Why do I believe this old man? My heart tells me to, but how can he take me to a new planet, or his statements. Wait, I am positive he had the same design that I have on the anklet bracelet on his… Who is he? What did I do? Oh no.

Read Chapter 2 when it comes!


	2. Chapter 2

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**Chapter 2:**

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**Cock-a-doodle-doo! Wait… there are no roosters in the forests! Bring. Bring. Wait again! There are no alarm clocks. **

**"Wake up! Wake up! It's time to have a good time!" wink wink s an old man. Wait! There is no old perverted man in the **

**forest. **

**Never mind. There is now. Grr… I hate old, sleazy men! **

**"Wake up! Wake up! It is a new day! Time to go!" said the old man standing in front of me.**

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh! Get out! I am only in my undergarments! OUT!" I yell. It's not as if he cares, though.

**"Come on! Upsize the Daisy! This old man wants to LEAVE" giggles the old man. It is like a weird giggle coming from a **

**girl, but it's coming from a guy!**

**"This old man is very perverted and needs to get out, NOW!" I yell.**

**"OKAY! YOU JUST HAD TO SAY PLEASE!" yells the old man. This old man just got weirder. Brr… It's cold. I changed **

**into the coolest clothes ever. Even if you don't care, I had on a beautiful green shirt with really awesome Japanese symbols **

**and their meanings and a skirt made from wood and leaves, and definitely not destroyable. Awesome right? Okay anyways, **

**I got out of my room. The old man came up and asked me if I was ready. I told him yes. He reached into his pocket. Since **

**I'm not very used to people, I thought he had a weapon so I kind of kicked him in the shins. His eyes became teary.**

**"Why'd you do that for?" asked the man.**

**"I thought you had a weapon…" I told him. "Funny, right?" I laughed.**

**"Not at all! All I was going to do was give you a pair of earrings, a necklace and a bracelet. I was going to wish you a safe **

**journey and give you a quick test and then if you passed it I was going to give you a brief story…" he replied.**

**All I heard was "Blah. Give you… Blah! Blah… continuing on and on!" A second later, he handed me the jewelry. It was **

**beautiful. He handed me some weird money and said thank you for your hospitality. I felt really mortified. I told him I could **

**not accept these generous gifts but he didn't care. He said KEEP THEM, _please. _Therefore, I did. He talked a bit and then **

**he handed me a huge book!**

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"What is this?" I questioned.**

**"It's a test." he answered. I sat down by the tree. It asked me weird questions like: what is a ninja? What is an elite ninja? **

**What is the Hokage? And etc. They were so weird. I finished it quickly. It was weirder. It took me about less than 2 hours. **

**There were 10 multiple choice questions and I think 190 questions where you had to write the answers. I think I did good. **

**Strange how the world works. **

**"You passed and good bye!" he said.**

**"What about my story?" I asked.**

**"You don't need it, you know it." he replied. We got on a bus and traveled. I felt like I was traveling in a crystal ball. Then **

**something happened.**

**Thump, I fall onto the ground into the middle of a grassy field. What just happened?**

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**Tune in for Chapter 3!**

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**Sadly, this was short!

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	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

**How weird can this get? First I was with an old man in the middle of the forest, now I'm in a ramen shop. **

**"Humana - Humana- hum- hum- yummy- yum- yum!" a guy with humongous eyebrows behind me said. Umm… how weird can this get. **

**"Ramen. Ramen. I love ramen! More!" said a blond boy said.**

**"Naruto, if you eat any more you'll kill us all!" said a girl with pink hair. Unusual, pink weird! It's not like one of them noticed I appeared from the blue! Then a guy with blue hair comes from behind me and kisses me. Joking! The guy with the big eyebrows comes up to me and says something I don't care about. I leave. Hahahaha! I walk. And walk. And walk. There is nothing to be seen but people. Where am I? There is weirder people everywhere. I decide to walk back to the ramen stand. I plop down next to the blond kid and take out my ramen and eat. **

**"Miss! DO NOT EAT SOMEBODY ELSE'S RAMEN IN MY PLACE. SHOO!" an old bitty man yells. As if I care. I decide to sit on the ground and eat it. Hehehehe…**

**I think I need to get a life. I have money. Yes I do. I look around. There are people everywhere. People! Real live people. Chill up my back people. Ugly people. Anyways, I notice some of the people have the same sign I have. I take it off and compare them. Some have different ones. Like a music note. Weird. A boy in the tree is staring down upon me. What does he think? Does he think I am worst than him. That he looks down upon me? Angry! Zoomana zoomy zoom. And I am in the tree. Ha. The boy looks frightened, as if he saw a ghost. He climbs down and walks toward the Naruto kid. **

**"Did you see a girl?" he asked.**

**"Yeh, she went up the tree." Naruto kid replied. I see wondering eyes. I decide to move to the other trees nearby. I jump from one to another until I am in the middle of the forest. I gather some leaves and a big tree branch and set camp. I fall asleep. I am so confused.**

** The middle of the night**

"**Who is she? I have never seen her. I must go seek sensei." a boy said. He left. **

** MORNING **

**Hmmm… a warm body next to mine. Ah. I wake up. "Good morning!" I declare forgetting the aspects of a woman. **

**"Good morning to you to" a man says. He's not bad looking but has a patch on one eye and is wearing different type of clothing. Wait! A man next to my camp bed.**

**"WHAT THE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? WHO ARE YOU? DID THE OLD GEYSER SEND YOU?" I yell.**

**"Wow. Easy now. I just came and fell asleep." he said. "My name is Kakashi. What's yours?" he asked. He smiled nicely. Wait. What am I saying? This man is almost double my age!**

**"Get out! Before I harm you!" I yelled. I decide to get out first. Instead.**

**"Wait, where are you going? That anklet does NOT belong to you!" he yells. Wait another second, am I not supposed to be the one in control? What is this man thinking? **

**"This is my anklet. My dead grandmother gave it to me. Stay back!" I raise my fists. He laughs. **

**"If they were yours, why doesn't it say your name on the back of it?" he asked.**

**"It's not supposed to. It just does not say Tami. Which is my name!" I declare.**

**"Hello, Tami! Good day. You're coming with me." Oh no! I let him know my name! What is going to happen now?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way shape or form!**

**Chapter 4:**

"…**You're coming with me!" the guy named Kakashi said. Oh My Gosh! I let him know my name. **

**Now, as the woman said in the village said comes to mind. "The men will take you away and hurt in many ways. There's a lot of ways. For example, the man might do…" Umm… I don't think I'll tell you how the women learned this because that's another story, but this man with a funny smile is taking me away. If he was older I would scream but for some reason I don't seem to care. THAT IS NOT THE POINT! **

**"Get away from ME!" I yell in a damsel in distress type of way. **

**"Feisty. Me like." he says.**

**"Way gross!" I exclaim. What does he think he's doing. Why am I walking with him for the quadrillionth time. I stop in my tracks. "I am NOT going with you. I am going home. Good bye!"**

**"No you're not." Kakashi says. He scoops me up and carries me. Now I am disgusted. I pound on his back to let me down. I am wearing a skirt. Oh shi! I forgot today was meant to be my laundry day, as in I'm not wearing any underpants. Oh My Goodness! What to do? What to do? **

**"Please put me down." I plead. "I'll walk next to you." I plead again.**

**"No, I am not allowed to trust anyone. So you'll stay put the way you are." Kakashi says. "Anyways, I like no wait… I love the sight from here." **

**I blush into a deep shade of red I have never ever have had. "Put me down you abnormal thing, (bastard). Now!" I scream at the top of my lungs.**

**"Okay. I'll put you down." he said. **

**On my feet I run. I ran so fast to the nearest flee market. I saw a pair of undies and took off. I mean who would miss them?**

**"I would miss them." Kakashi said in back off me. How did he get there? Stalking much. He flipped me and put me over his shoulder. And then he hit my neck and…**

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**SLEEPING TIME **

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(( not part of story: Lady Shijimi is the woman in Naruto Book 2. She was a character for only a little time. When Naruto and the others began getting assignments, they had to rescue her cat. She was a big fat woman, not to be rude, but true. She is the wife of the ruler of the land of fire. The cat's name is Tiger.))

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**"Good morning young one! Since I lost my Tiger-cutie I get to play with y****ou." Lady Shijimi said who was an enormous woman. **

**WHAT THE BEEPER HAPPENED?  
Tune in for Chapter 5!**


	5. Chapter 5

REMEMBER: Lady Shijimi is the woman in Naruto Book 2. She was a character for only a little time. When Naruto and the others began getting assignments, they had to rescue her cat. She was a big fat woman, not to be rude, but true. She is the wife of the ruler of the land of fire. The cat's name is Tiger.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape or form!

"Good morning young one! Since I lost my Tiger-cutie I get to play with you." Lady Shijimi said who was an enormous woman.

CHAPTER 5:

"Good morning Madame, but what am I doing in your humble home?" I stuttered looking up to the woman's grotesquely huge eyes.

"Kakashi, that sweet man, brought you here. He told me I could either let you pick: one, you help me find Tiger my kitty and get him for me. You see he's been gone for a long, long, long, long, lo…" Lady Shijimi was saying.

"Madame, I haven't got a lot of time, please go on about the choices." I said politely staring at the woman who stood so, so, so BIG!

"Oh, Choice two is that you become my new kitty cat!" She jumped in joy. I must say as she jumped the earth shook! "Meow." She meowed me. Ewe! Only if I had my pepper spray on me! Wait where is it?

"Where are my belongings?"

"Kakashi put some on that table next to you, but he told me to get rid of the other icky, bad stuff!"

"That man!" I stuttered.

"That's okay. Which is your choice one or two?"

"I pick number one choice, 1. When shall we begin?"

"Right now." she said. She got up and began walking towards the door. WOW THIS WOMAN IS HUGE. Even her butt looks like there's something in it. Wait a second, there is something in it. It's wedged in but I can pick it out. It's, it's, it's THE CAT!

"Madame, I think I found your cat."

Where is it honey?"

"It's kinda stuck in your, your…"  
"MY ass? I figured it had to be there. I have tweezers if you can pull it out."

"Tweezers are small. Aren't they?" I asked.

"Yes, but these are specially carved for me. In case this happens." she replied.

I got the tweezers from the poor butler. I put the humongous pair of tweezers in her ass and pulled as hard as I could. "It's not moving."

"OHHHHHHH!" she yelled. "Tweezers won't work use your HANDS!" OKAY! I AM NOT ABOUT TO STICK MY HANDS IN SOME LADY'S BUTT! I AM NOT GOING TO! I REFUSE. "Meow." Oh god. I don't want to become a kitty.

Censored… Censored… and more censoring being done. I found my PEPPER SPRAY!

"Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow. Meow." went Tiger the cat. It was a disgusting brown color! Oh my.

"Tiger my baby give me a kiss." The cat kissed the woman and then licked her face. Let me remind you, this cat went up her ass!

"here's some money. Leave." she shoed me away.

NEVER MENTION THIS DAY AGAIN. NEVER.

I somehow managed to get back into town. I saw the ramen shop and sat down. There I saw the same blond haired boy as before. I ordered some ramen and ate.

"Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! Slurp! SLURP! SLURP! SLURP!" slurped the bond boy.

This kid thinks he can slurp in a public place -- how rude! Yet fun -- but I'm not about to do it. The wonderful person I am, I began a conversation. Not really he began it, I just wanted to say I was wonderful. Anyways…

"What is up home dog!" he asked.

"Chillin' n' slurpin'!" I answered.

"Cool!" he said.

"What's up? Homey dog."

"Fizzling my nizzling and jazzing, etc."

IS NOT what happened.

"Hi. My name is Naruto Izumaki and I'll become the next HOKAGE."

"That's nice."

"Believe it."

The church bells were ringing. DING! DONG! DING!

"Repeat that?"

"Hi. My name is Naruto Izumaki and I'll become the next HOKAGE."

"Not that the other thing."  
"BELIEVE IT!" he said in slow motion.

I get it. That is what that old guy was talking about. To change the subject I asked, "Believe what?"

"It"

"Good one."

"What"

"WHAT" he asked. I left him puzzled.

I kept walking. Oooh. Look. A book store. YIPPEE! Time for me to relax. I entered the shop and browsed. Yes! New book by the "mysterious author I never met, wink, wink." _Icha Icha Paradise! _It was the last one left. Score, I rock! My hand gently and slowly moved towards the book. I felt my heart pumping. Pump. Pump. Pump. I quickly grabbed hold of the book. I felt other hands on the book. Karate chop the other hand. OWW! That was my other hand. I am going to make believe that didn't happen. Back to the story, oh yes, Pump! PUMP! PUMP! Went my heart. I felt warm hands on both of my hands. I glanced without looking at who these hands belonged to. I didn't care. My eyes hit his dashing eyes. I reached up to his face about to, to, to touch him. I, I, I

Slapped him right across the face. I got my pepper spray. And tied to spray it, but nothing came out. A smile crept upon the man's face. Oh well. Since it was empty, I had no use of it. Since it was vile, I stuck it in the man's mouth and ran. I paid for the book and ran.

"Hehehehehehehehehhehehehehhehehehhehehehhehehehehehhehehehheheh!" I laughed.

"Hahahahahhahahahahahhaahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahaha" he laughed.

I stopped and turned around, he didn't stop running and BOOM! Collision. He fell on top of me and we rolled down a hill and in the process I was on him, then he was on me, I was on him and so on. At the end he was on me. I opened my eyes to find this man was… KAKASHI!

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I yelled. He closed my mouth with his hand. You see I learned fro experience, no one would want to cover your mouth if you licked their hand, I mean they'd be grossed out, right? I began licking the hand that was over my mouth. Instead of him wiping his hand off and me yelling some more he said this:

"It's not time for that. We'll have time to do that later if you're still in the mood." I stopped the licking of the hand. This man was a pervert and a stalker. His weight was too much. He told me to give the book to him. It was the last copy. I told him no.

He allowed me to get back on my feet. "No. The book is mine."  
"Don't make me hurt you. I need that book!" he commanded.

"No it's mine I paid for it. Get lost."

"Don't make me hurt you!" he said again.

"Try?" I asked. He came up to me and gave me a hug. A FRIENDLY HUG!

"YOU Think that hurt me? You are wrong."

"Oh yah what about this?" He put his arms around me once more and kissed me on the cheek.

"WOW! YOU'RE A BIG MAN now! THAT IS NOT HOW YOU DO IT."

"how do you do it then, Miss Bigshot?" he questioned.

"LIKE THIS!" I yelled. I walked up to him and put my arms around him. I kissed him on the lips and he kissed me back. Oh my.

END OF CHAPTER 5

READ CHAPTER SIX WHEN IT COMES OUT INTO THE SHELVES OF THE WEBSITE!

-get it?


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